Hi! I know, I know… It’s been a while. Actually, it’s been a long while! When looking back here, I noticed that I had originally started this post back in August of 2020. That would have been a little over a month after my dad’s passing, a few weeks after joining Weight Watchers (again), and roughly five months into the COVID-19 pandemic, here.
Now, it’s November of 2022.
In the past two years I have lost a brother, broke a foot, had surgery, gained and lost a lot of weight, been put on new medication, have become the shortest person in my household, and have done a lot of soul searching and thinking about where I am and what I have been doing in my strangely lived life.
Let’s look back a bit here, shall we?
I was initially coming back to this blog as something to make myself feel good again, and give me the motivation I knew deep down I was going to need to continue with what I needed to do for myself. A few weeks after my dad died, I joined WW (Weight Watchers) again. His death was not fully unexpected, but it also was not figured to be so soon. He was 79, and as stubborn as they come. But I remembered one thing he kept telling me after he had had his first stroke not all that many years ago. He would call and chat while he was in a rehab center, relearning to walk and take care of himself, and while in a call with me would always wind up emotional and repeatedly tell me to make sure and take better care of myself, to take really good care of my health. It always broke me to hear him say that because he never once in my adult life told me I was too ‘fat’ or overweight, or that I looked anything but healthy. Truth be told, my weight was always a question for the doctors when I would go in for appointments, figuring they’d find me pre-diabetic or having high blood pressure or something that wasn’t quite right for someone of my height, with my weight, that would be considered ‘more serious’ than just having a bad back. (And that bad back has nothing to do with my weight, but everything to do with a stupid college dumb move injury.) So after his death, I was reminded of that and decided to do better, for myself, for my dad. Whether I ever actually made him proud or not, I wanted to make sure I took the last advice he had given me for the years up until his death, and do what was needed to be done. I know he’d be proud of me for just trying to do better with my weight, knowing that his weight was a significant reason for his health issues in his older age.
And I did okay. It didn’t last as long as I’d have liked, as I did wind up quitting later into 2021, but I had what I considered a really, really good reason to not stay on plan and just cancel things.
I broke my foot.
Not only did I break my foot, I managed to tear things up bad enough it could only be healed with surgical repairs and titanium plates and screws. Oh, and months of not being able to actually walk at all! I took to eating whatever anyone would bring me to eat, and that was the year we learned that DoorDash was the best thing in the world. It may have cost a bit more, but it meant a clean(er) kitchen, no risk of my teenager burning the house down, and frankly it was just easier to deal with. I can say there are times I think back on last summer and wish I had planned better for things to eat, though. I could have still stuck to WW, I’m sure. I may not have lost much, being stuck to being mostly immobile, but it would have helped me in the long run.
Moving into this year, I rejoined WW mid-May after a visit to my grandparents’ place to see them and my mother. She knew that WW was always something I did well with, if I stuck to it, and she did encourage me to join back up. I got home after that weekend, saw they had a deal going and signed back up right then, at the heaviest I had ever been (286.6lbs), with a solid determination to not let life get in the way of my attempting to be lighter and feel better about myself.
Now, here’s the rub…
Everything was going pretty well for the summer, I was doing okay with my eating, keeping track in the WW app, and frankly just happy with how things were going. Then, disaster struck in the form of COVID-19. That’s right. I managed to go over two years without contracting that nasty virus, and then I was stuck isolating in my basement while the husband was isolating upstairs, and the teenagers had the run of the main floor. Let’s just say that I know how I get when I have a cold or the flu or generally just feel sick, and my biggest concern was then, just making sure that I ate anything at all. So I didn’t really care what it was I ate as long as I ate. Needless to say, I didn’t eat the greatest, didn’t track anything, and where I didn’t gain much back at that point, I did manage to lose my progress some.
I have gone from a loss of 23.8lbs (as of my COVID-19 diagnosis) to now just a 20lb loss (as of November 7). This has me in a semi-good place, mentally, because it means I have not made things so much worse than I could have done, and it’s a reminder that I still have the determination to do better. (Even if I seem to risk sabotaging myself, repeatedly!)
But eating isn’t all of it, right? I mean I have to not just move more for my health, but I have this darned foot that has not wanted to fully cooperate with me after finishing physical therapy a year ago. Once I was able to start walking again, in a boot, with a cane, etc, I needed actual motivation to do so.
Enter The Conqueror Events!
These have been worth every penny I have put into them, and the medals earned have been gorgeous, but most of all, it’s the push and motivation I get to know I can complete these distances challenges with whatever it takes for me to do so. I have been using my daily steps, mostly, on them, because honestly I just need to walk around more often, even if it’s just around my living room and kitchen! I currently have one that’s just for me and my steps, and one that is just for outdoor/indoor walks and stationary biking with my son, who is doing that one with me. (Although, I do feel he may need a bit more motivation than I need sometimes to get off his butt and move more…) I am hoping that this winter, when it’s not just too cold, but too icy out to walk around the block, that I can get back into doing the Leslie Sansone videos on YouTube and using my stationary bike in the basement. I find that since both things are very easy to calculate the distance on, that those will be easiest to do. Otherwise, I have every intention of getting this Infinity Hoop back out and one day (when my foot cooperates more) getting back into doing yoga. Anything to get my body feeling better and be an example for my kids to want to keep healthy and active!
Of course everything has its setback items, and this is no different. I have been known to just not care when a depressive state sets in and is a struggle to get out of, so I eat whatever I feel like, or I don’t do my scheduled exercises. Or sometimes I just don’t eat at all. I also have a love/hate relationship with water, so I struggle to keep up with drinking my water every day. I did invest in a Cirkul and I love it, but I feel like I get sick of a flavor a little too quickly than I’d like before a cartridge is empty. I am trying though to do better about that, as a whole. Water is my biggest struggle, so I think I will be planning another ‘no soda’ month going into the holidays and see how that goes. I seem to do better at removing instead of adding things, lately!
Have I gone on enough here, yet?
Probably…
So with that said, here’s the blog plan: For the time being, I am planning on sticking to more WW content, recipes, updates, etc, as a means to keep myself accountable and on track. I also plan to get back not only into crafting more regularly, but posting about what I’m making, what I’ve made, and where it’s going. (I make a lot of gifts for family but also make things I hope be able to sell.) I am doing my best to read more again, too, and with that plan on at least suggesting the books I read, even if I don’t give details about them. Why not details? Because I am not a book reviewer, and I would likely wind up putting more spoilers in a post than I would ever intend on doing! Since I’m not a huge fan of spoilers, I wouldn’t want to inadvertently spoil something for someone, myself.
Oh, and if I’m feeling up to it, maybe I’ll share more about what’s going on with my family, what we get up to, what’s going on in our town, and anything else that comes along like that. We have a handful of new restaurants in town, plus new-to-me places I’ve not been yet, lots of things that go on here that I sometimes forget about happening, but we love participating in, and generally good things to share and talk about.
So, welcome!
Welcome back!
And don’t let me get too far away again, would ya?
Thanks!
♥